July 25, 2012 • 10:38 am
Well, I don't do recaps on my blog that often. I truly try to save this little beauty for design gems, recipes and fashion obsessions. But let's be serious, when your ex-fiance ends up on a prime time, multi-national television show about hooking up with chicks and potentially winning $250,000, it's like turning your head during a train wreck, you want to, you know you should, but sadly - you just can't. So how unfair would it be for me to watch it and not share my every thought. Haha! Well I won't share my EVERY thought, but I'll do my best to be politically correct and give you all my juicy opinions at the same time! You can decide on your own if I'm filtering or not. How about that? :)
First though – let's just say, although I think the concept of this show is brilliant and over-the-top entertaining, I would fail miserably at it. Especially after watching the first episode and realizing how much emphasis was put on having to lie, swindle and manipulate your way through the process. I'm a horrible liar- it's one of the things I love about myself the most – but at the same time it would be great to have those skills in a life or death or $250k situation. I just wasn't born that way. I was born with raw, no filter, sensorial–ness and sometimes very offside and outspoken skills. Which would kill me on this show. Not to mention, I somehow managed The Bachelor house filled with 25 chicks but normally I'm a total pansy when it comes to competition and feelings. I'm way too sensitive, territorial and would probably be that annoying crying girl on episode 2 if I went on Bachelor Pad.
Before I get to the part that you probably only care about, I just quickly want to mention a few other things – I fast-forwarded through a few parts so I may have missed some crucial aspects but here are my over all first impressions: The award for classiest Bachelor Pad contestant (so far) goes to Lindsay. Loved her outfit, loved her hair and loved her approach. Runner-up would be Rachel. Maybe it's the raspy voice that I'm partial to. Most entertaining is Erica- and yes, Ed. Erica is hilarious – I admit she's a bit abrasive and hard to handle at first, but after seeing her on BP2 – I was happy to see her back. She keeps things interesting and tells it how it is. Like for real.
I really have no opinion of anyone else yet - I mean the world knows I adore Stagliano and Reid is awesome. And yes, I will get to Ed. Kalon doesn't really register in my "I would like to waste energy talking about you" spectrum yet. Of course I'm not a fan but I've never met him in real life – so I'll just say nothing.
Ok. Ed. First off – was there a confrontation between Ed and Reid? I totally missed it and even tried to rewind a few times but gave up. Anyway I could just imagine what it was about and it wasn't about me. It was a pissing contest and that’s it. I appreciate Reid confronting Ed but at the end of the day, it is what it is – I'm not losing ANY sleep over the past so I'm just a bit disappointed that it (although I'm sure briefly) came between them at all.
I have been getting literally DOZENS of emails, tweets and FB messages about Ed's performance Monday night. I've gotten a lot of "you must be embarrassed" … "was he like this when you were together?" … "you dodged a bullet" and "Ed's a loser." Well I'd like to take this opportunity to tell you: Ed is not a loser. Our breakup was FAR from a perfect situation but I'll never at any point put him down.
At one point he was the most important person to me, so regardless of what happened between us, I'll do my best to have his back. But to answer your questions, yes, he WAS like this while we were together and no I am not embarrassed, and it's not so much about "dodging a bullet." I am sure Ed will make a fine husband one day – but just not my husband. I also happen to be in the best place in my life right now and it keeps getting better. I feel INCREDIBLY blessed and have a full happy heart and so it seems natural to back up and see the best in the people who shaped me and led me to where I am now.
I will also be judged for this comment but it would be unfair to Ed if I never said it – I actually thought he was really funny last night. I wasn't mortified once I actually laughed so hard and said to myself "hahahaha yup - that’s Ed!" Remember on The Bachelorette – the night when Ed got tipsy and farted during the rose ceremony? I loved that he let go of his inhibitions that night and took it a bit too far. It allowed me to relax a bit and allowed me to see a vulnerable side of him. There were many things that didn't make Ed right for me (and I am sure he could say the same) but to be honest I had a lot of fun with Ed when he was in "his prime" … but I also think it's very important to recognize, that that just may have also been the very same reason why we crashed and burned.
I am not saying he didn't take it too far, and also want to clarify that I do NOT "go for" guys who are always drunk and belligerent – but if you read Chris Harrison's recap of that night – or actually MEET Ed in real life, or ask ANYONE who is his friend, Ed is charming, fun, light-hearted and really just wants to make people laugh. He's not perfect.
At the end of the day – he'll always be someone that was important to me, I love his friends, I love his family. It's not my style to burn bridges or trash talk. Breakups are good for the heart if you manage them properly and in my case – allowed me to grow, learn and be grateful.
So there you have it. What did you think of the Bachelor Pad premiere? Tell me your thoughts in the comments below.