So, you went out on a limb… you gave a new guy your phone number, chatted for a bit, and even lined up one or two dates. You had great food, great wine, tasty coffee, but let's face facts: it just doesn't feel like a match. Has this ever happened to you?

Yeah, we thought so. There is no shortage of bad online dating stories that have evolved into pestering (or worse) after a first date has gone off the rails.

It’s just a reality of dating and meeting new people that you are going to be left in a position to have to reject someone, somewhere along the way. This isn’t a rejection of them as a person, of course... but when you’re on the receiving end of a “thanks, but no thanks” it can be very difficult to take it any other way. That being said, doing the rejecting can be even worse.


This is one of the reasons Tingle built calling and real-time messaging into their iPhone mobile dating app, so that if you find yourself trending toward awkwardness you can nip it in the bud by simply blocking the person. This works because with Tingle there’s no need to ever give someone your phone number.

But before you jump on the block button, here are a few easy (and possibly genuine) ways to let the person you’ve just met down gently when it comes time to say goodnight.

The Bank Shot
Suggest that while there’s no match, you have a friend whom you think might like him, and tell him that you’ll talk to her, show her his online dating profile, and get back to him if she’s into it. This leaves the door open for further communication so make it clear this is a “don’t call us, we’ll call you” situation.

The Redirect
If you actually like the guy but don’t feel that tingle of excitement that leads to romance, lay your cards on the table. It’s doubtful he’s so heavily invested in having a relationship with you that this redirect would be an issue. If a friendship can happen, it will naturally flow from honesty.

The Consultation
If you’ve been on a lot of these dates and can see this guy drowning, now’s where you can bring to bear your constructive criticisms, while making it clear that this is all in the interest of getting him hooked up -- with someone else. Become his bodhisattva of dating, if only briefly... it could be fun.

The Ex Rekindling
If you don’t feel it happening, weave an entirely believable yarn about having been feeling anxiety about your last relationship, and possibly toss in the fact that you are getting back together with your last boyfriend (if that’s still not working, casually mention he is a Navy SEAL). Most guys will back off here for their own wellbeing, emotional or otherwise.

But how about finding a date where you don’t have to bust out any of these tricks?

Try Tingle. It’s a free dating app for your iPhone, and if you sign up now you’ll be entered to win a $200 Visa gift card! Just use promo code JILLIAN before midnight on February 29.

Imagine never having to deliver a rejection again!

Today’s post is proudly sponsored by