It appears that my blog post to All my Single Ladies was quite a hit, which can mean only one thing: you’re all serious about being HAPPY and being YOU. The important thing to remember is that whether you’re hitched or on a dating hiatus, you can (and should) still be both.
Since the last blog was geared toward the solo femmes, this one is a checklist for those with a significant someone to ensure they’re aboard the relation-“ship” en route to happiness. If you say yes to the following, you’re probably doing the right thing and feel happy and confident in your relationship. If that little voice in your head reasons you to answer “no”, it might be time to take a step back and re-evaluate your dating approach and go easy out there. Take a simple step and go over these questions to ask a guy.
DO YOU SAY AT LEAST TWO POSITIVE THINGS ABOUT YOUR LOVE EVERY DAY?
One thing couples tend to forget to do over time is complimenting one another and share what you love about each other. When you’ve been together for a long time, the expectation arises that ‘of course they know I love them’, but without frequent encouragement and doting the feeling of love can dwindle. The power of the spoken word is strong, so use it wisely and use it to LOVE.
HAVE YOU KICKED THE STAGE 5 CLINGER TO THE CURB?
Have you ever noticed a friend (or if you take a healthy swig of honesty you may even admit this applies to you) crave the affection and attention of her man and end up getting the cold shoulder in return? The more she tugs, the more he pulls? It’s an interesting phenomenon in the human species that the needier a person becomes, the more rejection tends to surface. Do yourself a favour… rid yourself of the ‘stage 5’ and do your own thing. When he tells you he’s going to play golf with the boys, don’t bitch and nag and plead him to let you be his caddy. Instead, come up with your own plans. If it’s a healthy relationship, he’s not going anywhere and he’ll probably be more excited to see you after he’s finished conquering the 18.
This lines up my next question…
DO YOU STILL FEEL LIKE YOU?
In addition to shedding your inner clinger, staying true to who you are and keep busy with your own hobbies is unbelievably sexy for the fellas. Having your own life gives you a feeling of independence and confidence, and I promise your man will pick up on this and find himself more attracted to you.
DO YOU HAVE ANY SECRETS?
Hang on, don’t jump the gun. I’m not referring to secret lovers, shady bank accounts in the Cayman Islands or undisclosed criminal records. I’m talking moments; personal moments that are yours, and yours only. Keeping the mystery is a great way to ensure you don’t lose your sense of self and have things that are just for you. Being in a relationship, you share so much: stories, moments, love, passions and secrets. This person becomes your other half, which is a magnificent thing, but it’s also very refreshing to just do some things for you. This can be as simple as going for a coffee by yourself and having some you time without sharing. The right touch of mystery IS SEXY!!
So there you have it! A few of my tricks of the trade that have served me well and have kept my and Justin’s relationship passionate, intimate and full of love! More tips to come…
xo Jilly
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