OMG OMG OMG like seriously THE best episode of the Bachelor in BACHELOR HISTORY!!! I am still freaking out about last night’s episode. This episode always brings back tons of memories for me … it was the episode where I was sent home on the Bachelor. I remember the heartbreak like it was yesterday … I thought my world was totally over. It was also the episode on my season of the Bachelorette where I remember feeling totally in LOVE with THREE guys. Yup three… so Ben, you are totally ok with two!!!
I remember Jason not giving me the rose and thinking it was some kind of mistake. It had to be a producers glitch or something. But it was very real in my limo home, when I was grilled about how disappointed my family would be, how hard it would be to go back home empty handed … single. I sobbed like a baby. I felt like SUCH a failure. But … a few days went by, I got back to MY bed and reality started to sink in. It didn’t feel so bad. So, I didn’t love him after all, right? Of COURSE I did, but I realize now, Jason was VERY smart to let me go. Our “love” was like your bud from high school love. Which is awesome and very comfortable, but it’s not marriage love. And so obviously, for MANY reasons, I am SO grateful for that day. My friendship with Jason and Molly is very much still full of love, I would do anything for those two. That experience led me to so many ups and downs and wonderful things before finding Justin, who now fills my heart the way it is supposed to be filled.
But realizing all that in the moment, in a limo is IMPOSSIBLE. Remember, these girls have just gone through 8 weeks of being totally disconnected from society. No cell phone, no books, no TV, no friends to talk to… the ONLY stimulation is the constant talk about BEN … BEN BEN BEN BEN he is SO PERFECT FOR YOU. Not for the OTHER GIRLS … just for YOU. SO, by THIS stage of the game, you are CONVINCED that life with him is imminent.
I felt for Caila last night, that sweet girl was so invested and I could feel her confusion and heartbreak through my screen. After a few minutes, I was reminded of how quickly I bounced back, and then saw her AMAZING hair, body and attitude and I was like… ah… she will be FINE.
So, moving on to those other two!!! You know, It has taken me a while … but I am really warming up to Lauren. Not that I didn’t like her before – but I was missing that spark to convince me “she” was the one. But on last night’s episode, I saw a raw, gentle, loving side to her. And of course the fact that Ben dropped the L bomb on her I was like “OMG ITS OVER!!! ITS HER!!!!” and then….
He did it to JOJO (my fav since the beginning) and I thought my brain was going to explode! I don’t know if you guys know this but it’s sort of a “rule” on the Bachelor that you can’t tell the “contestants” that you love them until the VERY end … and so obviously they are switching things up a bit which I LOVE. And I also don’t blame Ben for loving two girls. My God. It’s possible, especially in these circumstances. Soon he will realize that one love is greater than the other and he will choose … but I still think this will be one of the most difficult finales in history…
I am still rooting for Jojo … mind you, if I got into ‘Fleiss Brain’ I feel like the BEST thing to do for the franchise at this point would be for Ben to choose Lauren and for them to make Jojo the Bachelorette … so … we will see … just a few weeks away!!!