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Jillian Harris

Who Is The Emotional Genius And Why I Broke Down Last Night

Hey Guysssss!!!!

I missed last week because I was in total vacation mode…SORRY!!! I had a few wonderful days off with my family, my bff Shannon, Justin AND Kaitlyn Bristowe. Hanging out with her made me understand her so much more and really appreciate what she is going through!…

kaitlyn at party

SOOO… Tuesdays are totally INSANE over here now, with blogs about The Bachelorette and last nights episode of Love It or List It Vancouver … mixed with the fact that I’ve done SWEET eff ALL for the last 10 days. I am SOOOOO behind! I’m going to TRY to make this one short so I can get caught up on my 1294 emails!

At this point you all know how I feel about Kaitlyn. She’s my favourite Bachelorette since … well myself! HAHA! She’s just real yo. She might not be the PERFECT cookie cutter example of a human, but that’s what makes her awesome. I feel like in the last 5 years we all (as a world lol) have been getting SOOOOO offended over EVERY LITTLE THING!!!! I think it’s time to take a big ol CHILL PILL and look for fun and humor in things again. Stop assuming the worst in people, assume the best, laugh at their mistakes and make this world a less cynical cranky place! I miss the 80’s … people could get away with anything back then.

chill out

ANYWAYYYYYYY moving on to The Bachelorette. I actually, for the first time since MY departure on the Bachelor, WEPT when Kaitlyn had to send Jared home. Even though Jared is ONE MASSIVE SWEETIE … I never saw a forever in him and Kaitlyn, but she obvisouly saw what a wonderful human he was and I could see the hurt in letting him go. It was the same way I felt when I let go of Michael, the break dancer on my season. At this point in the show, I am not lying to you guys, and you MIGHT think it’s impossible, but you ACTUALLY ARE FALLING IN LOVE with MORE than one person.


Think about a time when you were single for like 2 years. In those 2 years think about the different connections you had, who you might have slept with, who you might have fallen in love with. Now condense it all into 8 weeks, on TV. … that is REALLY what this is like. Remember, even though the FEELINGS and people are REAL (and NO it is NOT scripted) the journey is NOT real life, you have NO phone, NO email, NO TV, NO BOOKS, No Journal, No Family to trust and lean on. NO regular Gym sessions, work, or responsibilities. For the EIGHT WEEKS while you are filming EVERYTHING is about making a connection with that ONE person (or if you are the Bachelorette or Bachelor EVERYTHING is about finding and PICKING a person at the end). The stress and pressure that comes with that is INSANE, it actually drives people CRAZY and makes people jump the gun, cry, react, freakout, have irratic feelings and yes, maybe sleep with someone early. And also yes, fall in LOVE early. But those feelings, are still very very very real.

Lets talk about Joe for a second. We called him Sonic in our house because he strangely looks like sonic the hedgehog and while I have nothing bad to say about Joe, I don’t really have anything at all to say about him. Not a bad guy, seems cool, totally lost his sh!t when he got let go and … we move on!

sonic the hedgehog vs Joe

One thing that totally BLEW my MIND last night was how Shawn took the news about Kaitlyn sleeping with Nick.  Because of all the previews I expected her to tell ALL the guys and I expected them all to go completely tropical (ballistic) … but, Shawn, omg he took it like a CHAMP. I think it takes a freaking emotional genius at this stage of the game to be able to step outside of the box on this show and see it for WHAT IT IS, and not let the JOURNEY steer you off path. I was so proud of his reaction and the way he dealt with it, even though he probably wanted to kick the living poop out of Nick, he stayed strong and confident and tried to give Kaitlyn the benefit of the doubt.

kaitlyn bristowe skirtScreen Shot 2015-07-07 at 1.36.24 PM

Ok last but not least, lets talk about NICK. I’ve had his back since day one and I’m not reallllllllyyyyyyyyy changing my mind, but I also wasn’t that impressed with him this episode. He was being a little tattle tale and it was SUPER unattractive the way he was ratting Shawn out for conversations they obviously had.  But, you know what? Like I said above, this process can make you straight up CRAYYYYYY and at this point I think these two guys (Shawn and Nick) are SOOOO in love with Kaityln (or obsessed whatever you want to call it) that they are actually grasping at straws. They are freaking the frick out and doing ANYTHING to get her away from one another.  That won’t last long, and to be honest I think she is going to get over it. Something tells me next episode the focus is going to be on BEN, because through all of this drama he is the one that has stayed calm, cool and collected and will likely be a huge support system for Kaitlyn. Those two better figure their sh!it out and stop worrying about each other, otherwise they might just lose her all together!!!

kaitlyn bristowes sweater

Ok. That’s it. Wow. That wasn’t long at all and now I’m SOOOO behind today!!! bahhhhh!!!

Thanks for reading you guys! Love ya and thanks for stoping by!!! I would LOVE to hear your feedback!!!!



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  1. Jasmeen says:

    Great post Jillian!! I love reading your blog every week and appreciate your take on the show, especially from the perspective of being a past bachelorette yourself! I completely agree that there tends to be a lot of negative vibes out there these days so I totally enjoy your positive light! Never change!!
    Sincerely a fellow Canadian gal

  2. Bree Palmer says:

    Yup. That is all 😉

    I love Joe though and his reaction was a bit ok whatever but oh wells. I’m so very upset that I no longer get to look at Jareds beautiful face!!!! Damn.

    As usual you rock and good post.

    Good luck on catching up!!!!!

    P.s you killed it on love it or list it last night. #DesignerGoals

  3. camrycapri says:

    I adore everything about Ben.

  4. Marilyn Deane says:

    Hi Jillian! You told it like it is. I can’t imagine the tension and stress you encountered. I actually stopped watching the Bachelor after your season. My Aunt did, too, and we were talking about you just last week. We are so happy to see all the goodness that has come into your life and pray continued blessings for you <3

  5. Kate says:

    Jillian, yes I was AMAZED by how well shawn handled the news of Kaitlyn sleeping with Nick, but to call him an emotional genius???!!! What!? He is so beyond immature & insecure in how he treats Nick. What kind of emotional genius refers to someone as “the other guy” non stop? He’s judged Nick w/ out even taking a chance to get to know him and even more aggressively verbally attacks him & his character. The only emotional genius is Jared. I’m dissappointed you woiuld give Shawn so much credit & then in the following paragraph cut Nick down, when Shawn has done nothing but thrown Nick under the bus the entire time!!

  6. My Name says:

    Why must you always post those damn duck face photos of yourself. You’re so pretty and you like much prettier when you just smile naturally. Duck faces are for the junior high crowd.

    • kailey says:

      Let the women be silly and have some fun! Her duck face isn’t effecting anyone or anything so need no to criticize or put her down. Not your face not your problem 🙂

      Jillian you look great in every photo! Duck face or not 🙂

    • Sofia says:

      That was so incredibly rude “my name”. If you have nothing nice to say, don’t say anything.

  7. Lindsay Nead says:

    I couldn’t agree more with all of this! Love your commenting!

  8. Crystal Richard says:

    I’m not going to lie – I have been rooting for Shawn since the day I first saw him in your snapstory, I went home and started watching the show THAT night. The rest was history. But even I lost it a little bit when she let Jared go because he was so good about it.

    And yes – Shawn DID handle that news like a champ. Any girls that still think Shawn is whiney, can’t possibly still say that after how he handled that whole ordeal.

    And double yes – I’m excited to see where things go with Ben. If she doesn’t pick Shawn, Ben would be my next selection.

  9. Kate says:

    So Tony is a peaceful loving fun “Mr. Flanders” dad and Shawn is an emotional genius. Wow, I love you Jillian, but can’t disagree anymore with those two character assessments !

  10. MC says:

    I really wanted Jared to win, so I was very upset to see him leave. I do not like Sean or Nick at allll so now I am rooting for Ben!

  11. Kate says:

    Qualifications to be named an “EMOTIONAL GENIUS”:

    1. Don’t call someone you dislike by their name. Just refer to them as “the other guy”. Must be dedicated & not give in !

    2. Be insecure & project those insecurties on someone you dislike

    3. Verbally confront the person you dislike by accussing them of things & calling them names with
    absolutely no reasonable proof as support

    4. Be immature & talk badly about the person you dislike any & every chance you get

    5. Be jealous & entitled

    Okay everyone thats the 5 easy steps to be worth of Jillian Harris’s title of “emotional genius” . Look to Shawn Booth for examples on how to master it!! 🙂

  12. Suzy Hager says:

    Didn’t like Nick talking bad about Shawn either! And although Shawn reacted pretty good to Kaitlyn after she dropped the bomb, he was putting on an act, as it was obviously killing him inside. How else could he feel. I feel Ben would be a great Bachelor for next round!

    • Samantha says:

      you do realize Shawn has been talking badly about Nick the whole time since his arrival right?

      • Sara says:

        yes Samantha, Shawn was talking shit about Nick the whole time & never gave him a chance BUT you forget that Shawn can do no wrong & theres just somehting about Nick that everyone hates but since they can’t put a finger on it, any little thing he does is subject to hate and criticism. Its just the way it is.

      • Suzy Hager says:

        Don’t get me wrong, I am a fan of Nick’s since Andi’s season, was happy to see him again this season with Kaitlyn. My comment about Nick talking bad about Shawn was just how I felt watching the conversation.

        • Louise says:

          me too…very petty and in bad judgement. Shawn’s comments were justified bc of how Nick treated Andy last season.

  13. Lar Ali says:

    from what i am watching on my screen the relationship w/ K & N is clearly the easiest, most natural & most fun 🙂 Shawn is either very insecure or getting a horrible edit!! they have not shown anything where i actually felt the K & S were having fun :/ everything to me feels so strained between them because Shawn is more focused on Nick than Kaitlyn! i hope Kaitlyn is happily engaged w/ the man of her choice (not mine) 🙂 <3 🙂

  14. jamie says:

    How cute was Kaitlyn & Nicks date together! they were so natural & seem to bring out the good in one another. I loved the morning after breakfast scene too!!

  15. Alex says:

    Yes shawn took it like a champ! BUT he then went and verbally attacked Nick at the end of the show!! I think if they end up together they will have major trust and jealousy issues.

  16. Susie says:

    Not a Nick fan!!! If she was attracted to him she should of tried it out before stepping into the bachelorette! Sorry but I think she made herself look trashy, I get it people have Sex but really “lets date 10 guys have sex with one” go on to other dates and now let me just sit around thinking about the sex I had last night! Get a hold of yourself your dating several men Date them get to know them figure out who the connection is with and bring them to the end! I know she is a adult and she can make that decision but I think it was selfish on her part when she has other guys waiting and fighting for her attention and there she is having sex with a Guy she new before the show and new she had a connection with… SELFISH! if you new you had a connection before the show she was selfish to take the bachelorette spot! My theory she wanted FAME! Cant wait till the bachelor in paradise comes on so I can move past this season of bachelorette!

  17. Sara says:

    lol lol wait what? DId Jillian Harris really call Shawn who’s been the most emotionally unstable jealous insecure & immature person the show has ever seen an “emotional genius”. This had to be sarcasm right? Yes he took the news surprisingly well w/ Kaitlyn, but he projected his anger onto Nick. We need more Kiptyns & Jareds in this world and less Shawns. And I mean like No Shawns. He’s a meat head who attacked Nicks character w/out any proof or substance. Who does that? Sorry Jillian I think you are so wrong to ever call Shawn an emotional genius. The man needs therapy.

    • abigail says:

      Jill is prob only defending Shawn because she knows Kaitlyn picks him in the end and she likes Kaitlyn so she has to defend her man (no matter how yuck he is).

    • Vickie says:

      EXACTLY!!!His true colors will come out.. He is the worst partner for her

  18. Sara says:


    why fault Nick for talking badly about Shawn when Shawn has done nothing but talk badly about Nick to Kaitlyn w/out ever giving him a chance?

    I think Nick saying Shawn projects insecurities & never gave him a chance is so true & the reality. Kaitlyn will see that if she is watching the show & she’ll see Shawns accussations of Nick not being there for the right reasons are completely false.

    I dont understand why you call Shawn an emotional genius & say Nick is going cray cray? People value your opinion since you have a big fan base and are influenced by your thoughts. I think you should be more fair and careful when making judgements on people. I love you and think you’re an awesome kindhearted person but i’m dissappointed with the contents of this blog.

  19. PM says:

    Nick was not being a tattle tale or ratting out Shawn. He was just trying to warn Kaitlyn of Shawn’s braggadocious behavior. All Nick was saying was that Shawn is, in his observation, a ladies man that likes to brag about his exploits. This is not being a tattle tale on Nick’s part. This is what any friend would do if they saw something unfavorable in a potential suitor for their friend.

    I am a big fan of both Nick and Shawn and I hope they both “win” in some way. Whether that’s Kaitlyn’s heart or becoming the next Bachelor!

    • Meridith says:

      I agree with everything, except for being a fan of Shawn’s. I don’t think he is necessarily a horrible person, but one of my favorite quotes by MLK states”The ultimate measure of a man is not where he stands in moments of comfort & convenience, but where he stands in times of challenge & controversy”. Shawn has shown that he is willing to resort to immature, petty, mean spirited, malicious & antagonistic behavior in moments of insecurtity & jealousy. Shawn is not a real man. I love how Nick just remained calm and responded with the most reasonable & logical points while Shawn just continued to lash out at him w/ his fallacious argument. I would much rather be w/ someone like Nick. Say what you will, but the man has maintained his cool & composure, even being misunderstood 99% of the time by others. I don’t think it was bad that he was sharing his thoughts on Shawn to Kailtyn. I also it was interesting how on the San Antonio date Kaitlyn told Shawn “I trust you I want to hear these things from you” when Shawn talked about not trusting Nick, yet she was upset for Nick voicing his thoughts & concerns over Shawn’s douchey comments. I honestly don’t understand how any locgically thinking person can think Shawn is the good guy & Nick is the bad guy.

      • delicnat says:

        Well, watch Nick manipulate and navigate his conversation to ‘Eskimo’ and him carefully watch her reaction as he progressed and later lying saying: – I did not say we have been intimate, – I did not say we have been romantic, – I did not say we …
        when he did use those exact words after Joe let him know that Shawn had been invited to her place as well. Hi is trying to portray himself as confident mature intellectual and hi is smart but in the foxy slay way and actually probably most insecure person on the show. Just read how he pathetically tried to connect with Andy on fashion show and she totally ignored him. How low can you get? Shawn is right he is oblivious, so far all we know is that everyone he got close to and wanted to make ‘commitment ‘ to, did run away (his family and himself talked about his previous relationships), which is huge red flag. People that got to know him ‘intimately’ (and I do not talk about sex) did not want life long relationship with him. Probably he’s got some kind of sexuality and boyish appeal at start with but as time pass he do show his true colors and ‘potential’ wife run away. For record I do not know any of these people and this is my first reply to anybody’s comment but it did got me angry. Shawn may not be absolute catch but if I would have to chose between this 2 guys I wouldn’t touch Nick with 10ft pole. Sorry for this long vent and bad English.

  20. Mary McCulley says:

    Good review, agree with most of this. Just one thing…it’s “erratic,” not “irratic.” 😉

  21. Stacey says:

    I wouldnt be surprised if Jillian called an abusive husband an emotional genius

  22. VV says:

    Couldn’t agree more. Shawn might be portrayed like the jealous type and insecure. But I think it is just normal to feel that way. Everyone is saying, “He knows what he got himself into” BUT you can never be prepared on what’s gonna happen on the show. He obviously felt an instant connection with Kaitlyn. There is no plan here. It just show how genuine he is and how he’s willing to risk anything just to protect Kaitlyn from the person he felt like not there for the right reason. He might be wrong or maybe right (we’ll never know) but that is his gut instinct and he’s acting upon it. We can’t blame him. That’s real feelings there.

  23. Louise says:

    Jillian…off topic, but I’m very proud of your accomplishments. I don’t live in Vancouver, but watched an episode of LIOLI Vancouver and you’ve done really well for yourself! Good for you!

  24. Vickie says:

    Disagree about shawn…his true colors will be coming out…too possesive… He’ll bring her down.She’s a free spirit much like Nick..

  25. HAHA! I love the way to explain it all! What a season! This has been the MOST dramatic season ever!

  26. Miss_Erin_F says:

    I’m really hoping for a “Mesnick Moment” on After The Final Rose where she brings Ben H back to tell him she’s made a mistake and they will be together….just saying, it could happen.

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